Fight scene words

About

Great words to teach you how to write a fight scene - and for those writers who want to get the old gears of the mind cranking, here's a few fight scene tips to get you started - this is NOT by me, but some tips posted on NanoWriMo's board, a tip for the National Novel Writing Month.

I write a lot of fiction. Heroic fiction, to be more specific.

To be very specific, most of what I write involves the fantastic-- people with odd powers, in situations that just don’t happen in the “real world.” I can’t get any more specific than that-- it runs the gamut from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" fanfiction, to science-fiction, to fantasy, to a fantasy-type-thing that I can only call a comic book without pictures. I hesitate to call it pure fantasy-- as I am at least nodding in the direction of “hard science.”

Science-fantasy? That’ll do.

The one thing I am told I do well consistently is fight scenes, especially those that involve hand-to-hand combat or melee weapons. I’ve heard everything from “good fights,” to “man, I felt exhausted after just reading that, it felt like I was there.”

So, I thought I’d share something about writing up-close-and-personal violence, since I seem to be good at it.

The first rule of writing hand-to-hand violence is, as with anything else, “know what you’re talking about.”

Me? I’ve had my share of martial arts courses, and I’m a temperamental son-of-a-gun. I get in more than my share of conflicts, or at least I used to (I guess I’m mellowing with age).

But that doesn’t mean that if you want to write a good hand-to-hand fight, you have to run right out an enroll in the nearest karate school. Not at all. (Though it couldn’t hurt-- it’s a nasty old world, and getting nastier all the time, it seems. Besides-- it’s great exercise.)

But you do need to watch a lot of fights. Preferably “real” ones-- not what TV and movies pass off as fights. (Though, upon reflection, if you’re writing fight scenes with characters that have unusual abilities, it might be a good idea to watch some TV or movies with fights involving unusually-powered people.) I mean boxing matches, Pro Karate Association matches, and the like. Or, if there’s a martial arts school nearby, go and watch a class. Every decent school I’ve ever been involved with had at least some sparring in every class past the earliest ones. But make sure you ask permission! Nearly every instructor I’ve ever had would say yes-- but be annoyed if you didn’t ask. Explain that you want to write for a living, or for a hobby even, and that you need to learn something about violence. (Also, don't take pictures or video without asking, and if you ask, you'll probably get told no-- the instructor might have insurance issues with that, or be worried about the video showing up on YouTube. If there are kids present, he'd have to get parental permission to give you permission, etc, ad nauseum.)

Take notes. Copious notes. Don’t wait for the sparring. If you see a move that intrigues you during the drills, write it down. Describe it as best you can, then wait for the sparring to see how it’s used in “combat.”

Doesn’t sound too hard? Take a crack at it. But before you try using it in a story, read it to some people. Make sure they’re seeing what you are describing. This may take a bit of trial and error-- and expect the errors. Trim or add, as necessary.

For instance, here’s an example of one way to describe a spinning back-kick:

“John spun around and kicked the guy in the jaw.”

Um, that’s a little weak.

Let’s try again:

“John set himself sideways to his opponent, right side forward. His left foot came forward, crossing in front of his right, and his hands were tucked in close, left held vertically in front of his chest, right against his side, fist up, ready to punch. He spun counter-clockwise, on the ball of his left foot, right leg coming up knee-first, then extending as he spun, the heel of his right foot catching the man along the jaw, as John’s weight settled on to all of his left foot, giving his kick more power and stability.”

Well . . . while this might have it’s place (perhaps the very first time the character does anything violent, to let the reader know you can get that detailed, or just how good the character is), it’s a little over the top. Reach for the famed Happy Medium.

Take a gander at this:

“John shifted position and his feet crossed, left in front of right. He spun on his left foot, the right coming up and out, catching his opponent squarely in the jaw.”

Ah, much better. I can “see” that-- but it isn’t too detailed!

Next step-- determining when to use how much detail.

I’m going to let you in on a secret here-- one that a friend of mine, who raves about my fight scenes, didn’t believe at first.

This part is easy.

I have a work-in-progress that is, basically, a comic book, without the pictures. (Given that, it’s a good thing I can write fights, huh?) Here’s how I determine the detail level necessary for a fight scene;

First, ask yourself this: Is this a fight that will help define the character?

If the answer is yes, go for the detail. Wallow in it-- let the reader know the character's ability, be it high or low. In “A World in Need” (my comic-sans-pictures), my hero, the Shadow Soldier, started out a lost, hurt (emotionally, not physically) and frightened man. But he had once been a very skilled martial artist. So, the first fight he got into-- even before he had super-powers-- was important.

In the first draft, that scene opened like this: “Even as the leading thief swung his homemade blackjack (a one-inch socket, filled with lead and wrapped in leather) down towards the back of his head, Sean moved his upper body neatly to his right, leaving his left foot planted, leg out like a tripwire. The thief tripped, and as he fell forward Sean slammed his elbow back into the man’s gut, and snapped fist up into the man’s face. There was a crunch and a spray of blood as the thief’s suddenly-exhaled breath blew his blood on to the back of Sean’s hand.”

High detail. Not as high as it gets, but high. It was important that the reader see that this overweight, shy (or is it frightened?) man was once something more. Shortly after this fight, Sean (our hero) got shaky and almost ill from reaction-- despite the fact that he was never in any danger, as exhibited by the speed and ease with which he handled his attackers. I was trying to show that this was a man with lots of potential-- and that he was afraid of tapping it. For the most part, it worked. (Then I chucked the whole scene in rewrite. *sighs* Some days….)

Next question: How important is this fight to the story?

Usually-- not always, though-- the more important it is, the more detail you want. The first exception to this is, if the characters aren’t doing anything new, anything the audience hasn’t seen before-- then you don’t need to get detailed.

The second exception is pace.

If you aren’t worried about conveying urgency or haste-- get detailed. If there is any haste or urgency, sacrifice the detail to maintain the pace.

As an example, the first time in “A World in Need” that Sean-- now wearing a cobbled-together costume, and calling himself the Shadow Soldier-- fights another super-powered being, he is very badly outclassed, when it comes to raw power. The only real shot he has at taking the villain (a super-strong, super-tough psychopath, with no real imagination) down is to do it fast-- and without getting hit much, or at all if he can help it. So I started with more detail-- and lessened it, as things got more urgent.

Here’s a sample, from near the start: “Shadow Soldier simply dropped under the other man’s arms, moving sideways as he did so, and slammed his forearm across Preston’s stomach as he closed in. Preston staggered backwards and Shadow Soldier followed, kicking twice at Preston’s head, dropping the second kick, as Preston blocked near his head, to slam into the man’s stomach.”

This is about as high as the detail got, in this fight. The reader had been told that Shadow Soldier thought Preston’s weak spot was his stomach-- so they had to be shown that the stomach was the main target.

As I got close to the end, the detail lessened. At least until the final blows, which were (of course) highly detailed.

An example of less detailed, from after Preston first demonstrates that he’s hurting: “Immediately Shadow Soldier changed the focus of his attacks, alternating head shots with attacks to the stomach. His feet and his remaining good arm moved almost too fast to follow, leaving trails of grayish light behind them that almost seemed to weave a complex web around Dave Preston.”

See? I needed urgency. So, I sacrificed detail. But, for the final blows-- back to heavy detail. (Drama is everything, you know.)

Violence is not that hard. Or at least, writing it isn’t-- and no bruises, afterwards!

Three simple rules, then:

1) Know something about fighting.

2) Use detail to establish character, or the importance of the fight to the story.

3) Never let detail take away from pacing!

Keep these things in mind, read some books heavy on action and in no time, your friends will be begging you to get past the “mushy stuff”-- and back to the action!

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a villain to take down.

A hero’s work is never done….